What I Learned from Going Pseudo-Vegetarian for a Month

At least once a year, I decide to revamp my life to be 'healthier.' I'm usually inspired by my own health, or seemingly, lack of control over it. If I take care of my body by feeding it the right foods, sleeping enough, and working out a few times a week, then I should be relatively free of pains and ills. But sometimes, this isn't enough, or I get wrapped around the axel about the "right" foods. Even unprocessed tomatoes have a cycle of being good or bad depending on the growing source, preparation, storage, etc.

So this past July, we purchased half a cow, which was raised on a farm somewhere in the county on grass and grain. For three months, I ate beef every other day. Who could deny that steaks and hamburger from a local cow taste 10 times better than what's at Walmart?

As it turns out, there is a health cost to eating that much meat. See, I wasn't just eating red meat 4-5 times a week, but all other sources of protein (and some veggies) in my diet were replaced with delicious sirloin or short ribs drizzled in a smoky BBQ sauce. My muscles after a workout had the most amazing rippling effect, which doesn't sound that attractive, but the novelty was cool. The problem was how I felt after eating red meat. Gradually my complete satisfaction with a porterhouse turned into being so zonked after a meal, I wanted a nap (or a good cry - low energy is my kryptonite).

I also noticed that my pee had a weird soap-foam look to it, which can mean too much protein being excreted.* I thought of all the health sites I read where too much protein can wreak havoc on your kidneys. I tend to panic in these situations, and I realized I wanted to do an immediate diet makeover.

So I'm giving myself until Thanksgiving to be a psuedo-vegetarian, getting protein from eggs, fish, and maybe chicken once a week.

A psychological bit about 'vegetarianism.' When I was growing up, all the vegetarians I knew were fat, probably because they ate french fries and cake every day (lots of it). Not pointing any fingers, mind you… When you're a kid, the only food you really can eat is whatever your parents buy. I'm sure they ate healthier foods at the dinner table. I certainly have found that eating unprocessed foods gives me a mental edge (and it helps the abs), so my plan was to substitute animal protein sources with vegetables, soups, nuts, yogurt (ugh), and non-tropical fruits like apples and avocados.

Vegan is extreme. It deviates too much from what I grew up with (and what my ancestors typically ate, which involved a lot of gravy and potatoes). Red meat was a staple in our house, so I don't know if I could ever go whole-hog into vegetarianism for more than a month. Also, soy just doesn't taste good, although I've eaten it off and on for at least a decade. I know people who go vegan for a bit, but it's a temporary switch. Eventually, their bodies need some vitamin or mineral that only can be obtained from eggs or something. Also, vegan, like any other strict diet, can be isolating. I'm still not aware of too many restaurants that cater to vegans.

In the last few weeks, I've learned quite a bit that is worth mentioning:

• My ripply muscles have become even more vascular (move over Madonna), and I enjoy the way I look just the same as when I was on my SuperProtein diet. I know vanity shouldn't be the first thing on the list, but I work hard to fight office-ass.
• My energy level was immensely higher, which I attribute to the extra vitamins and fewer calories. More food = sluggish in most cases. 
• Despite avoiding beans because I hate them, my insides have been rather musical.
• Supplementation becomes super important if you cut out meat. I freaked out about the bubble bath I saw in the toilet, so I went cold turkey on my vitamins. Three weeks in, I started waking up in the middle of the night because I had jerked myself awake. My hand would cramp for a second, I'd wake up for twenty minutes, only to wake up again to my leg twitchme out of my doze. After four or five episodes of this, I Googled "insomnia caused by twitching" and came up with magnesium deficiency being a possible cause.** After resuming a daily dose, the twitching subsided.
• I hate yogurt too. It's basically a novelty food with sucky commercials.
• Finally, I don't crave sweets as badly as I did a few months ago. This could be a placebo effect, or the fact that I changed jobs, not necessarily something I can attribute to less red meat. But it's an interesting observation, nonetheless.

Maybe this psuedo-vegetarian theme can continue for the next six months. I can't tell if my experience is temporary relief or if there are more diet changes I can make to feel amazing.
We'll see after the holiday season!

*I was diagnosed with acute interstitial cystitis about this time, which has no known cause.
**I'm not a doctor, and I don't necessarily recommend looking health issues up on Google. However, my mind is hungry, and if I don't figure out some potential leads for fixing an issue, I'll incessantly worry myself into a state. The power of observation has served me way better than any Google site, and sometimes, even doctor's advice.

Oedipus Complex & Breaking the Cycle

Trolling through my usual blogs, Jezebel, Love Maegan, and Penelope Trunk, I was expecting some light reading since it was the holidays. However, Penelope Trunk is rarely a "light read." This week there was a picture of a giant bruise on her bare hip under the words, "I am at a hotel. I think I'm dying. I have a bruise from where the Farmer slammed me into our bed post."


Cue record scratching noise. I read the rest of the post, which was a highly descriptive account of her abusive spousal relationship. It bothered me so much that I read all of the comments, like I was expecting for some big reveal to the story I ingested. Nothing. 


I like reading Penelope Trunk's blog, as her opinions are well researched, but slightly controversial. I found her blog when I was devouring content about Tim Ferris' book, "4 Hour Body," another well researched book about minimum effort/maximum benefit. One afternoon I read most of her blog, discovering that she has Asperger's, a horrible childhood, and some very deep rooted issues. Her writing is refreshing though, as she points out her limitations and how it affects everyday tasks like going to the DMV without incident, for example.


I couldn't understand how she could be in a relationship where the safety of her children was at stake (in my mind, it's not ok for kids to see grown ups take something out on other people). The last line of the entry, "That’s why I can’t leave. I want someone to miss me." boggles me. Is it the Asperger's? 


Are we destined to follow our parents' footsteps? I sure as hell hope you have more free will than that. But I constantly see old college acquaintances in shotgun weddings, live the single-parent life, or work at the local Applebee's for a career. 


Growing up, my parents fought. Mom got out when it got bad, to which I'm forever grateful. Later, I realized that most people are attracted to people who are like their parents. Would this mean that I'd be in an abusive relationship? Would I find someone full of charm who would later turn out to be hateful? I looked hard for these things in all of my dates. I didn't marry someone until we had dated for six years, just to be sure, because I wouldn't want that to happen to my future kids. 


Do we have free will, can we make a deliberate decision not to repeat a negative cycle? I hope that I have the clarity to see the beginnings of a bad situation, because I've spent most days thinking about how bad situations begin. Before dating my husband, my mind was in another place, and had no self awareness, therefore it was hard to improve anything about myself. Worse, I didn't realize I had no self awareness. Maybe this is where Penelope is - she has an inkling about why things are the way they are, but feels no control in the situation. No one gives you feedback these days (unless you consider internet comments).


Maybe we all can change, but it takes the right set of variables. I hope Penelope and her kids can find these.

The Five Smartest Decisions I Made in the Last Decade

High school really sucked. I had a 40-hour part time job making hot dogs for minimum wage, no wheels, and perpetual motivation problems when it came to anything except writing. Of course, for those who knew me at the time, they will deny this and comment that I was making straight A's and could manage rides with all of my friends. Well, this was true too... but state of mind is a funny thing.

Today I feel very much in control of my life, and I attribute it to five smart decisions I made since then.

1. After a lot of relationship research (i.e. dating), I settled down with someone I can easily talk with and who cares about me. He's a nice person and sends me flowers randomly. We give each other energy.  We make decisions together. I will not say how many people I have dated, but it might be more than 20 and included all types (even a unicyclist).  Those folks were very nice, but they weren't for me. I pride myself in finding a person I could spend several lifetimes with (if that were feasible). He encourages me to be entirely authentic and pursue something I'm passionate about. He also keeps me honest and on the "high road" when it would be easy to slip into bad habits. Because of the accountability with someone I love and respect, I have been very productive, healthy, and overall happier, which makes this the most important decision I've made. 

2. Finishing a technical degree. This was my mom's suggestion, which was a good one. I'm going to go ahead and take the credit, since I am the one who finished dynamics with a B (plus another 133 credits of undergrad and 30 credits of graduate classes). I could have easily slipped into a language arts degree, which would have been fine except I didn't really know what kind of career I wanted. I knew that no money = hard life, so getting out of the current situation was a shiny carrot (I had graduated from hot dogs to enforcing the towel rule at the gym for minimum wage when at the undergrad level).

3. Living on campus. Dorms gave me free reign to enjoy the "college experience" of staying up late, talking with all kinds of people, and finding strategies for being creative on a budget. I also didn't have to clean bathrooms or kitchens - whew! This was probably the inception of me really walking in "turbo mode," since that was my main mode of transportation. I was totally inspired by the freedom of schedule, co-ed room parties, and doing that thing where you look cool while hanging out wasting time reading on a grassy patch.

Photo credit: tmkthefridge.tumblr.com

The biggest impact from this decision was learning that my lifestyle could be whatever I wanted it to be. I really appreciated things like the seasons, weather, good shoes, and Armin Van Buuren's music.

4. Doing a job that was totally in left field for me - teaching. As a technical trainer on Capitol Hill, I learned the importance of dressing well, as well as how to communicate without too many "ums." I can't say that I was particularly good at this job, which thickened my skin to criticism. This job also allowed me to travel to 17 states that I would not have visited otherwise, including Guam, and meeting a lot of cool people. Besides the whole "being on your feet for hours" and "lots of airport time," it was a sweet gig. I got burned out after being on the road three weeks out of the month, but all in all, it gave me confidence that I can manage doing something I wasn't trained for.

Not part of the training. Lessons in Guam.

5. Paying off all of my debt. Before I received money from Dad's estate, I had credit card and car debt on top of student loans, which totaled around $40K. It wasn't the best situation, especially since I decided I NEEDED a sports car after I started getting a steady paycheck. Also, at one point, I could only afford the credit card minimum. So I made the decision at 24 to get rid of my debt. At 26, I had zeroed out my credit card debt by paying triple the minimum (sometimes more). My car and student loan still were costing me $14K each, so I made the decision to work on my car loan. When my Dad passed, he left me some money, to which I paid off the remaining debt (although I definitely got some new shoes and a couple of steak dinners too). If I had kept going though, I would have finished my car debt and started working on my student loans. The point is that I prioritized what was owed and am now working on savings (plus other things I want like LASIK, braces, etc).  I also scrimped on things like cosmetics, furniture, and wardrobe pieces. There were a lot of hand-me-downs in the beginning, and that was OK for me.